Blogging can encourage doubt
Being a blogger can be the most magical experience. Blogging can be a wonderful experience. It can help you work through thoughts, connect with amazing people and find your own voice. However, with everything that is enjoyable, there are pitfalls; the main one being blogger’s doubt.
Doubt; is it good?
Doubt can help us survive, accessing risk is a vital part of a humans ability to survive. Nobody puts themselves in some danger without having doubts. However, doubt is often rooted in negativity and can feed our inner critic. This means we do not push ourselves to take opportunities that benefit us or we give up on things when it gets tough.
Doubt is one of my worst enemies; I do not do things if I there is elements where I am likely to fail. The fear of failure has always been a strong influence on me and my choices. I have often given up on projects that I found incredibly difficult and I am possibly the worst off for it.
Bloggers Euphoria verses Blogger doubt
I have often felt excitement and joy when I have had a post that has been more successful than usual or have been tagged by other bloggers for my content. The other side to this is, however, the times when your content goes unnoticed.
This can be often when many bloggers call it quits. They access the ratio of work they do and decide that the pay off is not worth it. Any blogger will testify to having doubts about their blog.
Being a blogger can often be a lonely adventure where you measure your success with numbers. There have been many times when I have looked at my statistics I have thought ‘What is the point’. Bloggers will experience low numbers and engagement, nobody makes it overnight.
Being a blogger can make you question yourself.
I have often asked myself why I carry on with it? What do I want to gain from it? What will happen if I do not achieve what I set out to achieve? Why should I keep blogging and writing these blogs?
I found myself sitting in the car one day after work, I tried to make notes on my phone and struggled. Experiencing quite a few negative thoughts surrounding the blog and I lacked inspiration.
However, I decided to list all of my doubts as a blogger instead of writing a post. I would like to share those doubts with you and explain how I have talked myself out of these doubts over the past few weeks.
I doubt the people want to hear what I have to say
Why would anyone want to listen to me? This often swirls through my overthinking mind. My background has resulted in me needed the approval of others in order to validate my self-worth, I am a conformist but I do not know how to ‘fit in’. Starting a blog has often made me question my worth as both a blogger and as an individual.
I find myself comparing my blog to others and feeling like I have failed. I see bloggers who have been blogging for a shorter time, have more success and I ask ‘what is wrong with me?’. Failing to realise that their success does not define my failure, failure is a subjective term. I do not know their situation so I cannot measure my own success based on theirs.
I often try to remind myself that I write for myself, it is a form of therapy. The act of writing has helped me unravel a chaotic brain. Having the tenancy to overthink situations and focusing my attention on writing helps clear my mind. I also know that I have some readers that look forward to my content, they may be often friends or family but if I provide happiness to just a handful of people then I am happy.
I doubt my writing skills
My A level in English Literature is one of my proudest achievements as it was a hard battle to get there. Discovering I was dyslexic at university made me realise just how hard-earned that A-level was. However, I still doubt my ability to write in an interesting and engaging way that is accurate at the same time.
Grammar and spelling have never been my strong point and that is the reason that I have to proof my work so many times before I post.. I still get things wrong, even using two different proofreading websites and my Yoast plugin telling me my sentences are too long and I have not composed my sentences well enough. My mother once said that the English language was the hardest to master as it often does not make sense, she was right with that.
I have learnt to be tenacious and refuse to let my dyslexia stop me; it is one of my greatest assets. I might take twice as long to produce a blog post but I know that it helps me develop my skills. As long as writing helps me offload my brain, then I will be happy.
I doubt I have the ability to keep the schedule
Having a schedule is an essential part of staying consistent with blogging. However, life and other commitments can get in the way. This then makes sticking to your schedule hard. I mainly write one month in advance, this gives me a buffer so that when life gets in the way, I know posts will still be scheduled.
Sticking to my schedule of two posts a week can make me doubt my ability to manage my time appropriately. I go through periods of not wanting to write as well as times when I have lots of energy to get stuff done. The month in advance schedule has enabled me to takes breaks when I have needed and be mindful that blogging is a hobby, not a chore.
The past two months have been difficult, I am a week behind, I have not kept to schedule. I am, however, mindful that, come the summer holidays, rectifying this will be possible.
I doubt that this is a phase
Being a ‘fall fast and hard’ type of girl; I have a tendency to become addicted to hobbies or things quickly, I overexpose myself and then it fizzles out eventually. This has happened with the gym, computer gaming, crafting, candles and I worry it will happen with blogging.
I have noticed my obsession with makeup has dwindled slightly and this concerns me. I still wear makeup and love discussing all things beauty, but I do not experiment with makeup as much as I used to do. This could possibly be due to my realisation that I had a slightly unhealthy relationship with makeup shopping. Another reason could be the act of blogging takes me away from my love of creative makeup.
I gave myself the goal of blogging for six months, then a year and now I have been blogging for over a year I am not sure I would call it a phase. Whether I continue blogging for two more months or two more years I am not ashamed to stop blogging if I do not enjoy it anymore.
I doubt that anything will come of it
There are so many bloggers and influencer’s out there, it is hard to stand out from the crowd. Initially, I imagined that there would be a possibility to build a brand from my name or get into writing in some way. I realise that I might have been somewhat unrealistic about my expectations of blogging.
However, this does not mean I have gained nothing from it. I have learnt so much on my blogging journey that I have been able to help other people. Having learnt so much about the internet, photography, writing and social media. I think I have learnt so much that even if I gave up today; having these skills for the rest of my life.
I doubt about the money I have invested
Unless you use a free platform and do not invest in anything extra, blogging does have costs. The cost of blogging soon mounts up; whether it is props for pictures, items for hauls or the cost of your domain name and host subscription.
At one point I suggested giving up to my husband and he reminded me that I had only just paid for a years hosting and it would waste the money. This reminded me that if I wanted the benefits; I had to first invest in all the time and the money.
I have doubts that I will get bored
As I have previously said, I get obsessed with something for a few years and then grew tired of it. I have always got to have some way of occupying my time, otherwise, I would stay in bed all day and give up being productive. This is the reason I tend to try to fill my time up with productive things; like pampering myself and writing.
Do you have doubts; whether you are a blogger or not do you identify with any of these doubts? What advise would you give to alleviate bloggers doubt; let me know in the comments?
Ciao for now beauties xx